Can I Collect Survivor Benefits If We Were Separated?

No, being separated or living in different states (like Delaware and New Jersey) does not stop you from collecting Social Security survivor benefits.

Because Social Security is a federal program, the rules are the same across all 50 states. As long as you were still legally married at the time of his death, your physical address is irrelevant to your eligibility.

Separation vs. Divorce

In the eyes of the Social Security Administration (SSA), you are either married or you are not.

• Legal separation: Even if you were separated (living apart or legally separated by a court), you are still considered a surviving spouse as long as a final decree of divorce was never issued.
• The nine-month rule: Generally, to collect survivor benefits, you must have been married for at least nine months before your spouse passed away. Since you were married for 17 years, you far exceed this requirement.

The State Line Myth

It does not matter that he lived in Delaware and you lived in New Jersey.

• Federal benefits: Social Security is managed by the federal government, not the states.
• Jurisdiction: His death certificate will be issued by Delaware, and you will apply using your New Jersey address. The SSA processes these types of multistate claims every day.

Eligibility Requirements

To collect these benefits, you generally must meet these criteria:

• Age: You can start collecting reduced survivor benefits as early as age 60 (or age 50 if you have a disability that started before or within seven years of his death).
• Caring for children: If you are caring for his child who is under age 16 or disabled, you may be eligible for benefits at any age.
• Current marital status: If you remarry before age 60, you generally cannot collect benefits on your deceased husband’s record (unless that marriage also ends). If you remarry after age 60, your eligibility for his survivor benefits is not affected.

What Should You Do Next?

1. Report the death: Usually, the funeral home does this, but you should confirm with the SSA.
    
2. Gather documents: You will need your marriage certificate, his death certificate, and Social Security numbers for both of you.
    
3. Contact the SSA: You cannot apply for survivor benefits online. You must call 1-800-772-1213 or visit your local Social Security office in New Jersey to make an appointment.

Note: If you are already receiving Social Security benefits on your own record, you can only receive the higher of the two amounts (your own or your husband’s); you cannot receive both in full.